Have you ever gone to a party, and got stuck talking to someone who loves their job, just a little too much? This is how it went for me:

Me (pretending to act interested): Really? You’re the team gynacologist for the Hungarian ladies Waterpolo squad. That must be nice for you.

Other guy: Mmmmhmmm

Now it’s hard not to slip something in their drink, just to shut them up. A little bit of cyanide in the cosmopolitan or some arsenic in their Appletini – basically whatever it takes.

Then why then do we find ourselves buying the Special Editions of DVDs? It’s just someone who loves their jobs a little too much bragging about it, AND you paid extra for the triple deluxe combo box set. It’s just always some guy saying how lucky he is to be making models for Tim Burton.

So where’s MY documentary? There’s no deluxe edition about me and my work. There’s no film crew, following me around school, while I’m stealing stationary from the teacher’s desk, or poking my friend with a cheap pen to keep him awake during a Monday morning math class.

Living in Melbourne and reading the Age, there are always profiles some guys working at Pixar:

Chuck is an animator at Pixar. He is currently working on the next pixar film ‘Coyote’. He was fortunate enough to have spent a month, all expenses paid, in Africa, studying the knee caps of coyotes. And because Scarlette Johansson provides one of the voices, Chuck got to spend some time with her, measuring her knee caps. Then, Chuck goes back to his desk, and gets felated by his Taiwanese ladyboy, and fed sushi by his cat. He spends the rest of his day, licking cavier off the breast of aspring model/actresses, flown up from LA on Steve Jobs private jet.

So what can I tell you, Chuck? Much as I admire your work at Pixar, I secretly hope that someday you get cavier poisoning or choke on the nipple of some aspiring Kiera Knightley wannabe.

And now for the Special Features…


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