No, actually, scrap that title, it was just that I had no idea what I was going to write today, because everyday is obviously very different from the last. For example, I woke up this morning and my alarm clock beeped in its usual exact nine minute intervals (I have no idea why; perhaps the manufacturers in Taiwan will only allow me 8 minutes and 59 seconds more sleep just to piss me off) whereas yesterday, I was woken by my neighbour calling for her cat. Seriously, I have no freaking idea what is UP with this woman and her cat. It doesn’t even have a name, she just refers to it as ‘pussy’. And believe me, I struggle to get to sleep at night when, at 1 in the morning, a woman is outside yelling ‘PUSSY!! PUSSY!! PUSSY WHERE ARE YOU? COME TO MAMA!’ and she should probably just ask the gardener. The conversation would probably go something along the lines of:

Crazy Cat-Lady: Have you seen my pussy?

Gardener: Why yes, I think its over there in the bushes.

Okay, sorry, maybe that last part was purely fictional, but you get my drift. Anyway, from what I have told you so far about my life, you are probably now aware that I do not delve very deep into important issues concerning the world (and that I’m probably just another horny teenager posting blogs about cats). Ah but you are wrong. Let me show you, with another example. You see, a couple weeks back, I was having a jolly old time with my friends on a bench along humble Collins Street in the city, we were watching people pass, innocently licking our ice creams and drinking our 7-11slurpees, when suddenly between brainfreezes, I notice… OH EM GEE!!! Someone’s just dropped a $10 note! No one else has seen… I run up to it… Heart pounding, I grab the blue note between my sticky ice cream hands, and you what I do? I put it in my pocket and save it for a rainy day. NO!! You know what I REALLY do? I’ll tell you what! I chase that man down Collins street until that note is safely returned to the cosy confines of the strangers wallet. See? I can be deep. And caring. And i like to think that, in one way or the other, I’m helping to ease the Global Financial Crisis. Yes indeed. You know what else I did that day? I helped my friend win a free slurpee by peeling off the tag on her cup. That’s right. Me. Saving the world, one free slurpee at a time.

Until tomorrow, I shall leave you with a quote:
“Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life.” -Brooke Shields, Actress.

AL

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